“Self-pity is a death that has no resurrection, a sinkhole from which no rescuing hand can drag you because you have chosen to sink.”
My question today is: “Do you have life or does life have you?”
Translation: Are you in charge? Are you running the show or do you feel like you are at the whim of the throes of life? Are you at the helm of your ship or are you being tossed to and fro on the waves?
I just returned from the Cayman Islands. It was quite fabulous. One day we took a sailing trip on a huge catamaran. Our captain’s name was Lorenzo….from Italy. You should have seen the size of the helm or steering wheel of this boat. It was the biggest I’ve ever seen! It was almost funny to look at because it seemed out of proportion to the size of the vessel. And boy could Lorenzo sail that ship! He sailed across the Atlantic in that boat. Now I know I said the catamaran was huge, but in comparison to the size of the Atlantic, that catamaran is like a small pea in a massive body of water.
I want you to know today that you are the Lorenzo of your life. You are experienced at life, you are well able to steer your vessel across the largest of oceans, and do it well at that. I know that sometimes you feel like you are small in comparison to the challenges of life that come your way, or to the internal conversations that loom in your face and whisper in your ears.
You have access to a helm that is wide and big and well able to navigate any “waters” that you need to cross!
Let me give you a secret: the helm in your life is your attitude. And the thing that will so easily steer you off course and into the rocks is self-pity.
Yesterday I was faced with a number of things that threatened to steer me off course. I could hear the subtle allure of self-pity…..wanting to lure me into it’s hell.
Yes, that’s right, hell. A place of despair, a place of loneliness, a place of separation from others. I have learned to recognize the sound of self-pity. “I am alone. No one understands. This is so hard. I have nothing going for me. I will be left behind. Poor me, I might as well give up.”
It’s disconcerting to me how subtle this is, how seductive, how easily self-pity can convince you that you are right, and what a tantalizing false security it promises to you.
The GOOD news is that we can be aware. We can choose consciousness that instills in us the power and the grace to choose LIFE, to lead LIFE, to create LIFE. You have that helm!!
Next time you hear the voice of self-pity, or if you are there today, remember you are a captain…..you are THE captain of your life and your destiny.
Find something to get excited about. Choose to get on top of your attitude and say no to self pity. Just lay it aside, give it no attention, and pick up attitudes of gratefulness and giving to others.
* As a final note: A large part of what I was going through yesterday was healing and releasing, a necessary part of our journey. My tears originated from a process of Divine grace deep inside of me. The same might be true for you. I believe self-pity likes to sneak into these beautiful places and distract us from the real healing that is taking place. It likes to sideswipe us just as we are about to enter the new place of freedom, and confine us to bondage and despair. So let’s keep our faces set towards acceptance, kindness, and forgiveness and we will do just fine.
See you out there on the open water!